PitchWars Critique - ELEMENTALISTS

PitchWars is at its heart about the writing community. And even though at the end of the day Mindy McGinnis and I were only able to choose two mentees, we still wanted a way to give feedback to the many many many others who had been kind enough to share their work with us. Our decision to do this via our blogs, rather than a private email, is so that (hopefully!) everyone can learn a little bit from this feedback.

I'm happy to say that quite a few people have been generous enough to take us up on this offer! So, through November, Mindy and I will be posting these critiques on Mondays and Wednesdays. Make sure to look for them on both of our blogs as we'll be posting totally different critiques.

And for anyone out there looking for personalized feedback, I am now offering manuscript critique services which you can find out more about here.

You'll see my comments in red.

Dear Ms. Quinn,

Sixteen-year-old Joel Blackford only believes the things he can see and touch are real. When tap water floats to him I'm not quite sure what this means. Floats out of the faucet? Is it only tap water that does this? I appreciate that you're trying to give a visual but this one is too muddled to work and rain leaves him dry this one is much better he’s desperate for a scientific explanation. Joel is an Elementalist Is this a scientific explanation? Seems more like a supernatural one. Maybe rework the previous sentence so that it connects better to this one. and his newfound ability to manipulate water comes with symptoms he must learn to control. The place to do this is in Renga Elementium, a city cut off from the rest of the world and full of Elementalists like him. So it seems like he was a normal kid in the contemporary world, but now he's going to this weird city. Maybe instead of "cut off from the rest of the world" use "in a world of magic completely different from the one Joel has known"? Or something similar that really captures this shift.

Once Joel arrives he starts having disturbing visions into the life of a long-deceased, legendary hero. He learns that a forgotten weapon from the last Elementalist war with the power to annihilate the world What world? This new city or the world he came from? was never destroyed. Joel’s best friends, Isaac and Katrina, urge him to keep his knowledge a secret so the weapon can never be found. 

If only Joel’s gift was keeping his big mouth shut. Ha. Great line. Good use of voice in a query.

Now a former mentor is after the weapon so he can use it to launch an elemental Armageddon against humanity. Joel and his friends will need to use the combined might of fire, earth, water and air to stop the man who trained him. If he doesn’t, his friends and family’s lives will be in grave peril as Elementalists clash against humanity. Great. This is exactly what the last paragraph should be - you clearly define the threat, what Joel must do to stop it, and what will happen if he fails.

ELEMENTALISTS: THE FIRES OF CANICUS is my debut novel. It is a YA contemporary fantasy, complete at 145,000 words. Oh no. Either that is a type of you have wwwwaaayyyy too many words in this MS. Anything over the 100K mark automatically gets the squinty, "what's happening here?" look. But this is (as I already stated) wwwayyyyy over that 100K mark. I know cutting words can be hard - especially when everything feels important. But really it's possible. Even just starting with those extra words like "just" or "that" can take several hundred words out. Beyond that, though, you may need to make some tough choices and really decide what is essential to your story. It is a standalone novel with three more in a planned series.

Thank you for your time and consideration,

First page:

The fist that struck the side of Joel’s face was faster than Joel's ability to dodge. I think there are ways to show this that are more dynamic. Especially for a first sentence where you want it to be extra perfect and just spot on. For me, the phrasing "the fist that struck" sounds a bit clumsy. Then "the side of Joel's face" isn't very specific. Is it his cheekbone? His left ear? His temple? His jaw? What about more simply something like, "Joel tried to dodge the giant fist. He failed."

            “Watch where you’re going, little man. You might hurt someone,” said Jake. 

            Joel stumbled backwards into the parking lot, getting thoroughly soaked by the rain as he wobbled. Would he be instantly thoroughly soaked? Maybe start simpler: Backwards into the parking lot and the pouring rain." Abe was helplessly pinned against the McDonalds wall by two of Jake’s oversized cronies. All they had done was accidentally bang the door into Jake on their way inside seeking shelter. Unfortunately, high school dropout drug dealers weren’t too big in the empathy department. Especially not one who put some poor ninth grader into the hospital last year.

Abe looked at Joel with wide pleading eyes. “Joel, help me!”

            “Shut up,” said one of Jake’s cronies, pressing his arm into Abe’s torso, making him wince.

            Joel rubbed the side of his face, allowing the rain to help cool the sting from the blow. “Let him go, Jake. It was an accident, alright? Just let him go and walk away.”

            Jake snorted and spat on the ground. “Who are you, anyway? His boyfriend?”

            “My name is Joel Blackford… and I’m warning you to back off.” This line feels a bit cliche. Can the hero of this story maybe have something a little fresher?

Joel had no idea where this reckless bravery was coming from. He was scarcely feeling the rain anymore and was almost oblivious to the fact that he was inevitably soaked. Do you need inevitably here? He might have been small, scrawny and sort of looked like a physicist who studied Latin for fun, but his dad had been a firefighter before he died three years ago, and the firefighter’s mentality had been long ingrained into Joel’s psyche.

Helping people was a virtue. Going into a burning building to save someone in spite of your own safety was a noble act. Fire was a powerful and often overwhelming foe. These bullies… they were simply a fire that needed to be put out, and as it so happened, Joel was surrounded by water. Great last paragraph! I like the way you go from the fire fighting with the dad into Joel using the water.

I think there's a lot you could do here to tighten up the writing. I also wonder if you're starting the story at the best point. From your query it seems that most of the action takes place in the Elementalist world, so you really want to get your MC there as quickly as possible.

PitchWars Critique - SNOWMAKER

PitchWars is at its heart about the writing community. And even though at the end of the day Mindy McGinnis and I were only able to choose two mentees, we still wanted a way to give feedback to the many many many others who had been kind enough to share their work with us. Our decision to do this via our blogs, rather than a private email, is so that (hopefully!) everyone can learn a little bit from this feedback.

And I'm happy to say that quite a few people have been generous enough to take us up on this offer! So, through November, Mindy and I will be posting these critiques on Mondays and Wednesdays. Make sure to look for them on both of our blogs as we'll be posting totally different critiques.

And for anyone out there looking for personalized feedback, I am now offering manuscript critique services which you can find out more about here. You'll see my comments in red.

Dear PitchWars Mentors,

I hope you will consider mentoring me for #PitchWars 2015. Complete at
52,000 words, SNOWMAKER is a post-apocalyptic novel for young adults.

This is great format wise, my only concern are these three words:

POST-APOCALYPTIC NOVEL. This is a very hard sell right

now.

After the moon split, extreme tidal waves and mass flooding destroyed
most of Earth’s habitable areas. Sixteen years later, Anza Perez lives
with her family on the Island of Colorado where they farm, hunt and
scavenge to survive. Every day, whether she is flipping old cars to
siphon gasoline, weeding endless rows of potatoes or searching through
moldy demolished houses for items useful in their survival, she stares
at the remainder moon in the sky and wants to know why the world-wide
destruction happened on the exact day she was born. This query so far

is so well written. The world is set-up. The main character is 

introduced. It's perfect... except. The thing that concerned me in 

the first paragraph (post-apocalyptic novel!) is even more of a 

concern now that I'm getting story details and it feels a little too

similar to other things out there on the market. Specifically the 

moon bit is almost exactly like events that kick off the brilliant 

series of books by Susan Beth Pfeffer that start with 

LIFE AS WE KNEW IT.

Anza is a curious teen who always asks one too many questions in
difficult conversations, nicknames those she loves best and inherited
from her father an incredible mechanical aptitude. As the youngest
sibling, she is also tired of being overprotected and treated like a

baby by her entire family. This paragraph should be cut. It tells us a bit 
about Anza but doesn't do anything to tell us about the main
conflict in the story. You want to keep queries as tight as possible
which means cutting anything and everything extraneous.

When a forest fire threatens their home, crops and orchards, Anza and
her father use a stolen military weather-controlling device called the
SnowMaker to create a torrential rainstorm to try and douse the
approaching flames. But the artificial storm attracts the attention of
those men who originally built the device. When they return to reclaim
the SnowMaker, Anza must use her technical skills and ingenuity to
defend her home and family against the ferocious weather war they
launch. I was with you up until the final sentence when I ended up having

too many questions. Like when the men come from the device, 

why not just say, "Here ya go. thanks!" I'm not sure how this 

sets off a "weather war" or - even more importantly what a 

weather war would look like. And yet despite being muddled

THIS right here is the part of your story I find most intriguing

because it feels the most original and like something I haven't seen

before. I'd recast the query to focus on this and make it much more

clear exactly how this weather war works and what it threatens to

take away from Anza, because the last thing I'm missing is the 

sentence that says, "If Anza doesn't stop do _____ and _____ to

stop the weather war then she'll lose ___ and ____." 

Readers who enjoy books like NOT A DROP TO DRINK (Mindy McGinnis) and
Z FOR ZACHARIAH (Robert C. O’Brien) will also be entertained by
SNOWMAKER. YES! You've done your homework. Great comps.

I am a freelance writer in Colorado and love hiking, volleyball, jelly
beans and home-made guacamole. Recently, my short horror story “Double
Yellow” received an honorable mention from Glimmer Train and Molotov
Cocktail’s Flash Fury Contest (July 2015). I am willing to work hard
during the editing and revising process and can’t wait to hear your
ideas. Great bio as well! Nicely done.

Thank you for your participation in PitchWars and for your consideration,

Holly Collingwood
CollingwoodWriting.com
Twitter: @WriteColl

SnowMaker - Chapter 1 - Scavengers

Anza gave one tire of the overturned car a spin and felt the rotten
rubber chafe against her hand. “We’re going to have to get it rocking
before it will flip,” she said as she examined the black streaks left
on her fingers. Nice first paragraph. You give us a little taste of the 

world right in the first sentence with the rotten rubber.
Exhilarated by the challenge, she spit into her hands and rubbed them
together. “Everyone find a good grip somewhere?” she asked her
friends. Their palms left sweaty, spitty marks on the car’s faded red
paint as the three girls tried out different places. “Now, push with
your shoulders. But don’t let it fall on you when it comes back down.”

“We know, Anza, we know,” Britt said.

“Ready? Okay, start it rocking.”

Anza knew from experience if they tried to siphon gas when the car was
upside down, it would spill all over the ground the moment they
unscrewed the gas cap. Then they would have to begin searching all
over again for a car that was not marked with an ‘X.’

Really great job of showing instead of telling here. But again,

I'm reading and the broken world with kids as scavengers, just

feels so familiar and like it's been done so many times.

Flinging her long braid over her shoulder, Anza and her friends slowly
started rocking it. The rusty car gained a little momentum with each
push. Rocking back and forth, its roof creaked and groaned as the
three girls strained. “Harder,” Anza groaned. And finally, like a
stubborn turtle, it flopped over and landed on its rotten tires. Great!

When the only tire that had any air left in it popped like gunfire as it

hit the ground, all three girls screamed and covered their ears in
surprise. And then Anza, Britt and Jess screamed again in success.

“Burn out, Marco, we could do it,” Anza boasted to her older brother
who had been watching doubtfully a dozen feet away. “Bring that gas
can over here, you lazy grump.” Her dark eyes glowed triumphantly.

Marco grunted nonchalantly with his hands on his hips, “I’m actually
slightly impressed. Only slightly though.” Then he thrust the gas can
and siphon tube at Anza. “Your turn, Bebita.”

Anza narrowed her eyes at the familiar nickname. “You know I hate
being called that. I’m not a baby anymore. By the way Mr. Seriously
Annoying, have you ever seen a baby strong enough to flip a car?” She
grabbed the gas can and turned away from him, “Now let’s see how much
gas we can get out of this thing.” The four scavengers had found this
little car resting on its roof in a lonely cul-de-sac. Each of the
other cars on the street already had Xs on them, signifying they had
already been drained and since they still needed about a dozen gallons
to meet their gas goal for the day, the girls thought this little red
car was their best option.

Disagreeing, Marco had refused to help.

Anza tucked a reckless curl behind her ear and tried to unscrew the
gas cap, but it was corroded in place. She kicked a rock and glared.
All that work to flip the car, and then the gas cap was stuck. 

This is so well written! The pacing, the characters, the way you set the 

scene is all really well done. If I hadn't already read so many books

that were similar I'd be all over this. But because this is such well

tread literary ground, I think you really need to do something

really different and original to stand out when writing post-apoc. It's

not a YA novel, but STATION ELEVEN is a great example of a post-

apoc novel that felt really fresh and original. Or alternately focus less

on the post-apoc elements and make this book more about the 

'weather war' stuff.

Best of luck and thank you for sharing!

Let's Do the #PitchWars Again

You guys!!!! It's #PitchWars time again!!

(For those who don't know what #PitchWars is - here's the deal: The brilliant amazing possibly super-powered Brenda Drake organizes this awesome contest that connects aspiring writers with mentors (like me!) and then we work together scrubbing and shining the aspiring author's manuscript until it is so stinking sparkly that agents will fight for the right to call it their own. For more info and to be part of the contest YOU MUST go to Brenda Drake's blog. Sound good?)

How excited am I to be a #PitchWars mentor for the second year in a row? 

Well it's sort of a combination of this

And this

So yeah. Pretty excited.

And adding to that excitement is that this year I am co-mentoring with Mindy McGinnis! Not only is Mindy an amazing author (see: NOT A DROP TO DRINK, IN A HANDFUL OF DUST, and the upcoming A MADNESS SO DISCREET) and a wonderful friend, but she is a fabulous critique partner as well. If you are a believer in the two heads are better than one theory, well you're in luck because Mindy and I will be working in tandem to make your manuscript shine. (And if you're wondering what kind of manuscripts Mindy will be looking for and how she likes to critique make sure to visit her blog as well!)

And like last year I (along with Mindy) will once again be mentoring...

                                         

Yep YOUNG ADULT!!! Yay!!

So what am I looking for in your young adult manuscripts? Well... Strong often unlikeable protagonists, complicated antagonists, kick-ass girls, romance, depth and darkness, fun, having my heart ripped out, laugh-out-loud moments, mystery, thrills, paranormal elements, realistic elements, cute puppies, and weirdness.

Your book does not need to have all of those elements. Actually, it definitely shouldn't because my head would explode and I don't think that's something any of us want to see happen. BUT the one thing I MUST have is strong writing. That doesn't mean it has to be literary or lyrical or bursting at the seams with similes (oh please definitely NOT that last one), but it needs to have that certain something that's a mixture of craft and voice and your own personal secret sauce that just makes every page sing.

So basically I am open to everything and I never really know what exactly will grab me. I am definitely NOT turned off by language, sex, or violence - in fact, when it's a necessary part of the story, I believe it's important to include these elements. But your character does not have to drop f-bombs for me to love them.

If you want a good idea of what I like to read check out my Goodreads. I try to keep this updated every few months with what I've recently read. 

So that's what I'm looking for. But this is about more than me falling in love, you need to find a mentor that fits into what you need as well. To that end, let me tell you a bit about myself and my critique style.

You could say I have a strong arts backgrounds. Or you could say I have two college degrees of questionable worth. I prefer the former. Anyway, from undergrad I have a BFA in theatre and then, after several years of graduate school, I gained an MFA in film and television production.

I am represented by Suzie Townsend of New Leaf Literary. My own books are: ANOTHER LITTLE PIECE (HarperTeen 2013),  (DON'T YOU) FORGET ABOUT ME (HarperTeen 2014) and the upcoming DOWN WITH THE SHINE (coming April 26th, 2016 from HarperTeen).

And here are a few places you can find me online:

Twitter: @katekaryusquinn (I'll be tweeting with the #PitchWars hashtag, so make sure you're following me!)

Tumblr: katekaryusquinn

facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katekaryusquinnauthor

Instagram: https://instagram.com/katekaryusquinn/

So what kind of feedback can you expect from me? 

...Actually let me start with what you won't get from me. 

I am not big on correcting grammar, spelling, punctuation, and other things of that nature. That's not to say that these things are not important - they are. I am just not the person to make those elements shine.

I don't expect you to write like me. Or to write your story the way that I'd write it. Instead, I want to help you write the story in your voice and style, and tell it the way you need it to be told. I will, however, occasionally throw different ideas out. In my screenwriting classes ages and ages ago (see that MFA does come in handy!) my one teacher used to call the process of throwing different ideas out spitballing. Sometimes you use the spitballed idea, but mostly it just helps get your own ideas flowing.

I will never tell you that your story sucks. Or you suck. That doesn't mean I'll only have positive things to say, because ooohhhh trust me I will point out what is not working for me. But I also always make a point of talking about the things that are working oh so very well. Personally, I find the odd "YAY!!" "HEE HEE HEE!" or "LOVE LOVE LOVE!" comments can make an otherwise tough critique go down a lot easier.

Finally, do not expect only a line or two of notes for feedback. As you may have guessed from this blog post, I can be a little long winded at times. And yes, sometimes I do go on and on and on and... Okay, I'll stop now. The point is, I tend it give pretty long critiques with lots and lots and lots of thoughts.  

You can also check out the query and first page critiques I did on Brenda's blog a while ago to get an idea of how I work. 

Or you can look at my mentee and alternate mentee from last year. Danielle Mages Amato is a true #PitchWars success story. She found her agent through the contest and then just recently... well I'll just let the deal announcement speak for itself.

And here she is discussing the experience in her own words:

ODE TO THE AWESOMENESS OF KATE
Last year, I had the crazy, once-in-a-lifetime, what-act-of-kindness-did-I-commit-in-a-past-life-to-deserve-this, amazing luck of having Kate Karyus Quinn as my Pitch Wars mentor. When I was first scanning the list of possibilities, I knew I wanted someone collaborative, someone who would not only point out places where my story could be stronger but would also help me brainstorm solutions. I craved as much feedback as possible and as many big-picture insights as I could get. In my heart of hearts, I dreamed of a fairy bookmother, who could wave a magic wand and make my manuscript sparkle like a glass slipper on its way to the agent round. I GOT ALL THAT AND MORE. Kate was unbelievably generous with her time and her praise. She pointed out all my plot holes and held my hand as I spitballed crazy ideas about how to fix them. She helped me answer big-picture questions about the novel, AND she opened my eyes to some of my bad writing habits on the scene and sentence level -- things I'd never noticed that, once addressed, made a global improvement in my writing. She was more than just the fairy bookmother I'd imagined, she was a true friend -- to both my book and to me. *gets weepy* Honestly, I lived the Pitch Wars dream: an ridiculously fantastic mentor, who helped me snag a killer agent (directly from the PW agent round), who helped me find an amazing editor at an amazing imprint for my debut. If you're thinking of submitting to Kate, stop thinking. Doooooooo iiiiiiiiit. PS: also read her books, because they are beyond awesome.

And my alternate mentee Tracie L. Martin is just amazing and talented in so many ways and I expect good news from her any day  now. And she was kind enough to write up a little endorsement as well.

I LOVE KATE. I’d tap it out in Morse code if I knew how. Each PitchWars mentor has a different style. Some are like life coaches. Some are like drill sergeants. Kate was like the best of writing partners:  smart enough to see my weaknesses immediately, generous with sharing her insider experience, and so whipsmart solid in the craft I could trust her judgement completely. You’ll love her sharp eye for plot-holes and her even sharper one on character development. If you like the weird and the wonderful and you want someone to help you take your writing to the level of quality those kind of books demand, then put her on the top of your sub list.

Okay, we're almost done here, but in case some of you are reading this and wondering, "Okay but what if I submit my work to you and don't get picked as your mentee, cause that sort of sucks." Well yes, it does suck (although hey if you want to be in this business handling rejection is unfortunately a huge part of it). BUT you might get chosen as someone else's mentee (which is why you get several picks) and that would be awesome! However, some people won't get picked and so Mindy and I had a discussion about what we can do for those writers. Cause let's face it - everyone can benefit from a little extra feedback. So we put our heads together and decided to offer a query and first page critiques which will be posted publicly our own blogs to those who submit to us but are not chosen as mentees. If you're interested in that offer we'll post it again once the mentee lists go up and all you'll have to do is simply email us at our Pitchwars email address (kate.min.pitchwars@gmail.com) to opt in. 

Okay, that's almost it from me except for one more thing...

A giveaway!!! To celebrate the awesomeness that is #PitchWars Mindy and I are co-hosting a givewaway of our new books. Enter the Rafflecopter below and you might win: a signed ARC of A MADNESS SO DISCREET, a signed ARC of DOWN WITH THE SHINE, and a copy of AMONG THE SHADOWS, an upcoming YA anthology of dark stories that Mindy and I (along with another very talented author Demitria Lunetta) edited and contributed our own short stories to as well. 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

1. Kes Trester (co-mentoring with Jennifer Hawkins) 2. Mindy McGinnis (co-mentoring with Kate Karyus Quinn) 3. N.K. Traver 4. Kristin B. Wright 5. Laura Heffernan 6. Mary Ann Marlowe 7. Joy McCullough-Carranza 8. Lisa Lewis-Tyre 9. Jenni L. Walsh (co-mentoring with Trisha Leaver) 10. Sarah Glenn Marsh 11. Julie C. Dao 12. Kellye Garrett 13. K.T. Hanna 14. Jessie Devine 15. Rosalyn Eves 16. Jami Nord 17. Samantha Joyce 18. Helene Dunbar 19. Jenna Lehne 20. Linsey Miller 21. Jessica Vitalis 22. Stacey Graham 23. Dan Koboldt 24. Brighton Walsh 25. Kate Brauning 26. Lisa Maxwell 27. Wendy Spinale 28. Sarah Cannon 29. L.L. McKinney 30. Juliana Brandt 31. Scarlett Cole 32. Hayley Stone 33. Jennifer Blackwood 34. Kendra Young 35. S.P. McConnell 36. Nikki Roberti

37. Emmie Mears 38. Lori Goldstein (co-mentoring with Chelsea Bobulski) 39. Jennifer Hawkins (co-mentoring with Kes Trester) 40. Elizabeth Briggs 41. Ron Walters (co-mentoring with Meredith McCardle) 42. Fiona McLaren (co-mentoring with Dionne McCulloch) 43. S.M. Johnston (co-mentoring with Stacey Nash) 44. Max Wirestone 45. Jaye Robin Brown 46. Molly Lee 47. Rachel Lynn Solomon 48. J.C. Nelson 49. Holly Faur 50. Sonia Hartl 51. Natasha Raulerson 52. Marty Mayberry 53. J.C. Davis 54. Rebecca Wells 55. Michelle Hauck 56. Tabitha Martin 57. Rebecca Petruck 58. Sarah Henning 59. Alex White 60. Jeanmarie Anaya 61. Laura Salter 62. Wade Albert White 63. Brooks Benjamin 64. Margarita Montimore 65. Megan Grimit 66. Charlie Holmberg 67. Diana Gallager 68. Stefanie Wass 69. Tamara Mataya 70. Rebecca Sky 71. Kara Seal 72. Lee Gjertsen Malone

73. Katie Bucklein 74. Kevin A Springer 75. Brianna Shrum 76. Kate Karyus Quinn (co-mentoring with Mindy McGinnis) 77. Kim Graff 78. Emily Martin 79. Trisha Leaver (co-mentoring with Jenni Walsh) 80. Kim Long 81. Catherine Scully 82. Stacey Trombley 83. Stephanie Scott (co-mentoring with Valerie Cole) 84. Valerie Cole (co-mentoring with Stephanie Scott) 85. Lizzy Charles 86. Dannie Morin (co-mentoring with Alexandra Alessandri) 87. Kate Foster 88. Elly Blake 89. Julie Sondra Decker 90. Lady Lioness 91. Susan Gray Foster (co-mentoring with Monica Bustamante Wagner_ 92. Kelly Calabrese 93. Sarah Nicolas 94. Kelly Siskind 95. Roselle Kaes 96. Monica Bustamante Wagner (co-mentoring with Susan Gray Foster) 97. Renee Ahdieh (co-mentoring with Traci Chee) 98. Traci Chee (co-mentoring with Renee Ahdieh) 99. Janet B. Taylor 100. Jessie Humphries (co-mentoring with Mara Rae) 101. Lynnette Labelle 102. Erica M. Chapman 103. Summer Spence 104. Marieke Nijkamp 105. Meredith McCardle (co-mentoring with Ron Walters) 106. Thomas Torre 107. Phil Stamper 108. J.A. Souders

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DOWN WITH THE SHINE Cover Reveal and Giveaways!!!

Do you have trouble keeping secrets? Usually, I don't. EXCEPT when I get a new cover. Then it's soooo hard to keep it secret, because I just want to show it to everyone. But I can't until the official cover reveal day. Luckily, that day is (FINALLY!) today! 

WHHHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So without further ado, here it is...

Isn't it pretty!??!

And here is the official book description:

There's a reason they say "be careful what you wish for." Just ask the girl who wished to be thinner and ended up smaller than Thumbelina, or the boy who asked for "balls of steel" and got them-literally. And never wish for your party to go on forever. Not unless you want your guests to be struck down by debilitating pain if they try to leave.

These are things Lennie only learns when it's too late-after she brings some of her uncles' moonshine to a party and toasts to dozens of wishes, including a big wish of her own: to bring back her best friend, Dylan, who was abducted and murdered six months ago.

Lennie didn't mean to cause so much chaos. She always thought her uncles' moonshine toast was just a tradition. And when they talked about carrying on their "important family legacy," she thought they meant good old-fashioned bootlegging.

As it turns out, they meant granting wishes. And Lennie has just granted more in one night than her uncles would grant in a year.

Now she has to find a way to undo the damage. But once granted, a wish can't be unmade...

But that's not all! I also have 2 giveaways going on right now!!

The first is at Young Adult Books Central where the official cover reveal took place. Go there now and enter to win a signed ARC of DOWN WITH THE SHINE. 

The second is an exclusive giveaway for newsletter subscribers only. I'm giving away a swag pack that includes an etched mason jar mug, buttons, bookmarks, and bookplates. You can find the giveaway and sign up for the newsletter here.

*****Edited to add a picture of the finished mug with the custom etching. (It's the one on the left. The smaller one on the right will be reserved for another giveaway sometime in the future).

Announcing a Dark and Scary YA Anthology

I am super excited to be part of an amazing group of 13 young adult authors who have come together to self-publish, AMONG THE SHADOWS: 13 STORIES OF DARKNESSS AND LIGHT.

To help put this collection together we have a Kickstarter going on right now. If you are interested in giving some of your hard-earned dollars (donations start as low as $5 and go all the way up to $500) there are some great rewards that should appeal to both writers and readers alike.

You can also check out the amazing front and back covers below and squeee over all the talented authors who have contributed their short stories to the collection!

 

Who Killed the YA Scream Queens?

Apparently every single one of the YA Scream Queens were recently killed in a series of twisted and highly original ways. 

Which is so cool.

I mean terrible.

Can't it be both?

How about... terribly cool. And tragic. But mostly the first thing.

Which isn't to say that I did it. Even if certain people (Whitney Miller *cough cough*) are trying to point the finger at me.

If you want to find the guilty parties, then you need to find out who has a motive. Any idiot who's ever seen a few Law & Order repeats knows that.

And I don't got no motive. 

Okay, sure, I've been known to complain a few times that I wish the YA Scream Queens could maybe do a little less, well, screaming. But what can you do, it's right there in their name. Sure I might be a little sadder about their passing if they were the YA Whisper Queens, but I wouldn't kill them because of it.

But you know who would? Lisa Maxwell. I hear she's one of those people with super sensitive ears. And lately there's been some thumping sounds ringing in those same ears... sure sounds like your classic tell-tale heart scenario. Seems like maybe she should be moved to the top of the suspect list (and why you're at it, cross me right off it).